The second part is addressed to the opposite audience of the last blog. It is addressed to those who truly believe that they can change anyone. The short answer is No.
People do not change for you - and it is as simple as that.
If they are pressured to change for you and it is successful, you receive an unwanted version of your own ego-self. You agree to damage something that you got in love with.
We get attracted to people who are opposite to us. However, when we get familiar and close to each other, we try to bend the other human's personality over to make it better fit our own personality. What’s the reason?
Isn't it more exciting to have a conversation with someone of different views than yours? Isn’t what you got attracted to?
When we choose a partner, friend, or business partner in our life, we identify their personality and character. We make a conscious decision to have that person in our life. We take responsibility for having this type of relationship we agree to.
I laugh when I hear former partners bad mouthing each other, friends complaining how they got stooged by each other and businesses failing because of that one person.. At the end of the day this person was your choice and it’s your choice and responsibility to have him/her the way they are.
I believe the longest artificially made relationships are between romantic partners (friends come and go, professional network keeps changing). The longer people co-exist, the more pressure partners can feel from their other half to be expected to be someone else.
If you want someone else, you’d better realise it before you go on a long term journey together, and before you waste too much of each other’s time.
When you want to change someone because you are upset, emotional, angry, jealous or insecure, remember that you are about to destroy those unique features of your partner that you got in love with.
If I look at my other post (STRAIGHT TALK)**, any problem should be solved without leaving the room you are in. If you have a problem with anybody, sit down and have a conversation on the topic that bothers you. This can resolve many issues before they even escalate further.
Ange
*The first part was published HERE on 6/06/2022 while written on 30/03/2022
**The STRAIGHT TALK was written on 27/05/2022 and can be seen HERE.
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