Don’t be harsh on yourself - that way you can avoid a thing called “moral indulgence”.
Tested and proved in Cambridge, as human beings, we tend to do things we regret later under the influence of decisions we were not happy with earlier in the day.
When you move on quicker, you send a message to your brain 🧠 to stop producing the hormone responsible for stress. Learning to manage your frustrations, will help you to avoid things like: stress overeating, depression, self-doubt, lack of confidence, anxiety and anti-social behaviours.
When you blame yourself, your brain receives a huge portion of the stress hormone. In order to cope with it, it will be looking for a way to “indulge” itself - normally, it will be something that sets you out of your normal lifestyle. Some examples of brain behaviour during the moral indulgence:
⚡️ missed a deadline for a project. Brain response: “well, you missed one, go and miss another one”
⚡️ Eat a piece of cake on a diet. Brain response: “one piece...another one. It doesn’t matter already, but you will feel better”
⚡️ Not successful at job applications. Brain response: “yes, you are useless, you are not good at what you do, people say you should set yourself for less”
⚡️ Break up with someone. Brain response: “it’s your fault - you did/said/responded wrong, didn’t do something for someone, not good enough for someone..”
Instead, give yourself ONE good thought on any negative situation you have - in order to extract that ONE lesson out of it. Make your unsuccessful experience to be hungry for a better day; make your deadline failure to learn a better time-management; make your piece of a cake a single cheating day to shake your metabolism up; make your unsuccessful job interview to become hungrier for success and motivated to fight for what you want, finally, forget to think that you owe someone to be someone who you are not - their loss, not yours.
Regards,
Ange xx
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