You need to have results in order to be a truly confident person.
A lot of people these days try to look confident because being confident is trendy. However, the first real step to being a confident person is to have outcomes in your life.
I am not talking about achievements yet. They are a part of your outcomes. The outcomes may not be achievements, however, they are the required stepping stones.
Achievements = results, outcomes, actions.
Outcomes = the end result of all that shit that happens to you outside of your comfort zone; it can be good and can be terrible.
You can notice that people that have nothing to bring to the table are normally the ones that talk the most.
You can notice that people that achieve something are normally the ones that listen to others first before they speak.
It is one of the features of confidence. You don’t have to talk much. You have things that speak for themselves.
There is no artificial way of becoming a more confident person. There is no other person/coach/guru/mentor that can make you confident. Receiving guidance is one thing and it can be taken from the outer world. However, taking an action and receiving an outcome are boosting that confidence.
In my view, there are two layers of confidence - one you get after the other.
Confidence in yourself. Meaning, you know yourself well enough to push yourself further, way far out of your comfort zone. You can set goals (not just dream about things) and you can constantly go towards your goals. In the end, you receive an outcome. A good outcome motivates you to set a new goal that will be higher, harder, and more rewarding. A bad outcome makes you take a step back and learn one of the best lessons of the current chapter of your life. This lesson and the knowledge you got out of it is something that makes you better, stronger, more resilient, and hungry for another outcome.
Confidence in the external world around you. For example, how many times the Universe or God did send a person into your life and you wondered what for? For friendship? For love? For resilience and a life lesson? For good sex? For an adventure? For self-development? Etc etc etc.. Knowing what people, events, and opportunities come to your life for is the next level of confidence.
Looking at my life for the past 3-4 years, I understand that everyone who came in and out of my life did actually come for a reason. When I recognised a reason from the beginning, I received a tremendously great outcome. When I misunderstood the role of a person, they could turn out (not necessarily though) to be the worst actors in my life (and life is the theatre and the journey, right???), however, they could make my life easier, better and I could get better and give better. The earlier you recognise the role of a person, the better journey it will be for both of you.
But start with yourself first. I guess the end of the year is a good time to invest some time in goal setting.
Ange xx
Post Instagram from 6.12.2022
Photographer: Frank Dababneh @dfd_photography
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